tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1838800005947652160.post6767456945980161618..comments2023-03-24T07:35:25.794-04:00Comments on Save the Cracker!: Day Four: Bad Cracker! BAD!Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1838800005947652160.post-35178621628304732422008-07-19T15:46:00.000-04:002008-07-19T15:46:00.000-04:00Nothing but the best for Josh. Gotta be Cheeses of...Nothing but the best for Josh. Gotta be <A HREF="http://www.findownersearch.com/brand/3489913/" REL="nofollow">Cheeses of Nazareth</A>!<BR/><BR/>IMO, Catholics do the cracker thang every week precisely to get at the blood. Yummy wine! On that score they've got it right. Somehow we Baptists got the bogus message that Jeeebus turned water into Welchade. Lame, lame, lame........the mad LOLscientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18132033559071605774noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1838800005947652160.post-65203766060968577152008-07-18T11:55:00.000-04:002008-07-18T11:55:00.000-04:00I've read other comments about the best way to tak...I've read other comments about the best way to take a Eucharist. Apparently, straight-with-no-chaser is *not* recommended. I don't know how the Catholics do it every week. Maybe that's why they lunge for the blood right after?<BR/><BR/>I am a fan of peanut butter, but the cheese seems more appropriate somehow. I think I'll market something called "Jeez Whiz" for precisely this situation. You can spray in in your mouth right before you get to the front of the line, swallow your cracker, and wash it all down. We could do cheddar, port wine, bleu jeez... Hmmmm....<BR/><BR/>I like the bear idea, too. If I can get the Catholics and Muslims angry with me at once, maybe they'll show up at the same time and have a pitched battle in the cul-de-sac, and I can escape out the back.<BR/><BR/>As for <I>Lamb</I>, I came to the name "Josh" first, then almost immediately remembered that wholly awesome book. I had started with "Yeshua," then shortened it to "Yesh," but that sounded too much like a Sean Connery impersonation. Then "Josh" popped into my head, followed by my memory of Chris Moore's book about 10 seconds later. <BR/><BR/>I'll talk to Josh about the math, but it might take awhile for him to understand. Look at the math in the Bible! I'm not sure I can get him to understand fractions, much less weights and measures. But we'll see what he says -- he's pretty sleepy from being smuggled in to the midnight Batman movie last night...CrackerBandithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03677635194154621938noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1838800005947652160.post-11671541897023920372008-07-18T11:39:00.000-04:002008-07-18T11:39:00.000-04:00Did you call the cracker Josh cuz you read Lamb by...Did you call the cracker Josh cuz you read Lamb by Christopher Moore? I hope so.<BR/>Ask Josh this for me: doing the math, if each hosty cracker weighs in at 1/10th of an ounce, that's 160 per lb. Assuming JC was a big strapping carpenter dude of 200 lbs, that means if more that 32000 Catholix eat mass on a given day, someone's going to be eating a faux host. The apologists will probably say that not all the cracker is made up of God but that seems like a ripoff to me.<BR/><BR/>BodachBrucehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06998330715436256077noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1838800005947652160.post-63653718554531997312008-07-18T07:50:00.000-04:002008-07-18T07:50:00.000-04:00Just had to say - KEEP IT UP. I've been following ...Just had to say - KEEP IT UP. I've been following Crackergate closely, and this blog is far and away the best bit.<BR/><BR/>As to what to do if they don't rescue Josh - well, as I suggested on the Freethinker website, get some more of his buddies, crush them into a fine powder, use them to stuff a teddy bear and then call the bear Mohammed. Step back and watch the fireworks !!<BR/><BR/>RogAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16064783125921621752noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1838800005947652160.post-79980604202396610892008-07-18T00:18:00.000-04:002008-07-18T00:18:00.000-04:00If you do end up eating Josh, might I suggest a ni...If you do end up eating Josh, might I suggest a nice topping? They are pretty tasteless, especially without the blood of christ chaser.<BR/><BR/>I'm thinking a nice can of Easy Cheese.Velvet74https://www.blogger.com/profile/01811275599975812173noreply@blogger.com